Dad: Your Mother and I are going to divorce next month.
Dad: Not divorce, Disney Studios.
Dad: STUPID GALAXY S4!
Me: Amanda Bynes pour gasoline on her dog and almost lit it on fire, how can you say she isn’t crazy?
Dad: That’s not a big deal, I almost lit our dog on fire once.
MOM: Mrs. Batman is sending forms. I will get notarized as soon as I get them :)
MOM: I meant to hit period.
ME: Instead of… Batman?
DAD: Channel 44, record, record, record!!!!!
(five minutes later)
DAD: I need confirmation of recording!!!!
(three minutes later)
DAD: CONFIRMATION NEEDED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ME: You want to record Kim Kardashian’s wedding?
DAD: Did you record it?
MOM: I just saw your hair in the vacuum. Made me miss you. : (
And lastly, if you grew up in ATL, this is pretty spot on.