funny fridays on wednesday

Today is my last day of work this week, so here goes Funny Fridays:

DAD: Kolbe ate a snail today.
DAD: Now he’s puking up the snail.
DAD: He’s eating it again
DAD: Hell probably puke it up again.
DAD: His life is so interesting. He should be the star of a sitcom. I’ll call it “The Dog”

GRANDMA: Hi jen, bought u nice big bag of kotex. luv u
DAD: I saw a really small dog at the dog park and thought of you!
ME: Thats me! Really small! Was it cute?
DAD: Nope. It was one of the ugliest dogs I’ve ever seen.
DAD: But it’s whats on the inside that counts!
DAD: Thats my philosophy

DAD: Got yelled at by my boss and was feeling down. Then I started thinking “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger…” …pumping my fist and feeling like a champ. Yea!

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